Dearest little one,
When it comes to high school, do not believe everything you hear. Don’t let yourself or others dramatize what high school is supposed to be. High school should never be the best or the worst years of your life. They are simply a part of it. High school is 4 years of your life where you get to learn and grow and hopefully deepen your relationship with yourself. It’s this beautiful time when you always have a roof over your head and food on the table. It’s when even after you scream at your parents for existing, you can still go to sleep at night knowing that you are safe.
Try everything. Think you might like tennis? Try it. Want to speak German? Awesome. Want to try out an instrument? Go for it! Don’t decide exactly who you are your freshman year and force yourself to stick to that. Try things out! Even if they don’t end up working out, at least you can say that you gave it a shot. It is so much easier to pick up these hobbies in high school than later when you’re 25 and sitting on the couch. You have so many incredible resources right in front of you and teachers/coaches that want to help!
Don’t date. I’m not telling you this so that you save yourself, or stay pure or anything like that. I’m telling you this because dating in high school isn’t worth the trouble. You have so much growing to do, just like all of the people around you. Maybe date around a little, go out and enjoy another person, but don’t settle down and don’t fall in love. You only have a few years to be completely yourself; don’t waste them on someone else.
If you do date; do it right. If something doesn’t feel right, know that you can always leave. If your stomach starts to hurt, and your hands clamp up, and even for the briefest moment your thoughts scream “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?” I am telling you to leave. I don’t care if it’s awkward, I don’t care if you need to call your mom to pick you up. I don’t care if you get up from the dinner table and leave his parents house without even saying a word. When you meet the person you are supposed to be with; it won’t be hard. And even when it is awkward, the love you feel for that person will outweigh the scary thoughts.
So go home to your parent’s house. Eat a pint of ice cream and watch the unlimited channels they stupidly pay for. Talk to your mom about college and ask about what her life was like in high school. Go count your dollars from your crappy waitressing job and spend it on something awesome and frivolous. You only get 4 years. Release your hate, and enjoy every single moment.